Never Think
by Sending Hello
Summary: They were always best friends; Joe Grey and Lilly Truscott. Until one accident made all the difference. It was the worst-good mistake they've both ever made. But now she has something to carry for 9 months. The problem is - he doesn't know.
1. There's No Way In

_Woo! My first ever chapter on fanfiction! *parties*_

_Back to business. _

_I'm not really sure how this is going to go because I tend to delete tons of my stories before giving them a chance xD I'll have like 5 stories and hate them and there's only 1 and a half of chapters._

_Cross your / my fingers that that doesn't happen to this! (: I like drama._

_hahaa._

_Enjoy!  
If that's possible._

_:P_

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_Never Think_

_Chapter 1_

"You should try it." Hayley suggested while giving me the mere sticks.

I sighed while sluggishly dragging myself to the bathroom.

It had to be negative. There was no way in…

I slammed the door shut and ripped open the four packages surrounding the objects.

This was it.

I tapped my fingers against the cheapy bathroom counters.  
Tick tock, tick tock.

I looked down at my watch.

"Five, four, three two…" I quietly said.

I looked down to find my results scattered around the space on the ledge.

+ - + + + +

Positive.

All of the plus signs in the world couldn't add up to the terror now. I'm only 17.

This couldn't have been happening.

_No._

_I'm not pregnant!! In a few minutes, I'm going to wake up and I'll find that this was just a dream – nothing more. _I thought.

_Nothing more than a dream. Nothing more than a dream._ I chanted at myself.

Boy, was I wrong.

I slumped down into the smallest corner the tiny bathroom could provide. This was reality. Reality and not a dream. _Impossible._

_How?_ I screamed in my head.

That was a stupid question.

My stomach felt very glassy after that. If you touched it, it would shatter into a million pieces.

Knock.

Knock.

Knock.

The slightest three knocks on the wooden door made me loose my train of thought.

"Lilly….?" Hayley said in a small voice.

"I'm going to die, Hale." I whispered. Whispering was all I could manage – although even in a quiet voice, it was meant to sound bitter. I failed.

The knob attached to the wooden entrance did a small turn, and there Hayley was; running toward me like I was on my death bed. I wanted to imagine I was.

"Oh!" She exclaimed in a voice even she could barely control. I couldn't tell if she wanted it to sound thrilled or sound like an agonized little kid from a horror movie. Either way; it didn't matter to me.

Hayley slumped down next to me in a gesture of comfort. She reached out her hand to wipe away a few –or dozens- of the fallen tears that had escaped from my eyes. I didn't even notice tears had been streaming down my face all of this time.

"You need to tell him."

"I know."

Slowly and steadily, I got up to retreat to the sofa in the living room.

I picked up my cell phone with the frozen fingers I possessed and looked through my contacts.

"Hayley, Mom, Olivia, Jacob, Dad, Nick…" I mumbled to myself.

Finally; the right person.

"Joe."

Yes. Joe Grey. The cute and funny one of the insanely popular boy band.

My best friend.

But also - right now, at least - my worst nightmare.

He was on tour.

Probably even across the stinking world.

And I was here.

In northern Michigan.

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_READ THIS._

_Mmkay. So I won't update as much as I would like to, but I can't. I never have very many ideas! I HAVE to think harder because there's so many great writers out there. And I not only want to be as great as them, but I also don't want to take their ideas._

_By the way ; the Jonas Brothers aren't in here. I've had issues *cough* with someone, so it's the Grey Brothers. I know that sounds insanely stupid, but that's all I can do. _

_And, I know this is in the category of 'Hannah Montana' and it is... kinda. Only because of Lilly, really. But if you're wondering, Hayley is like... Lilly's cousin AND best friend. I know she isn't in Hannah Montana and I made her up; but work with me here. Miley won't be in it, most likely. Oliver probably will. I don't know. AND -_

_ALSO!!!!!!!!!!!!  
_

_My writing skills will get better as this story unfolds._

_This is just a warm up!_

_  
Lots of love._

_~Ness!_**  
**


	2. The Back Story

_Yaaay. Chapter 2! Awesome, right? Yeah. Umm. Not. ^^  
_

_Don't worry. This is still appropriate. I don't know why I rated this T. Whatevs._

_Enjoy!_

_:P  
_

_lessthanthree_

_~Ness_

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[The Back Story]

_August 23, 2008_

I suddenly shot up.

No.

This is all a joke.

"Joe…" I yelled in an almost muted whisper.

"Mmmm?" The shaggy haired boy heavily sleeping next to me groaned.

"Joseph!" I screeched in horror and smacked his head.

His eyes shot open.

He couldn't have believed it more than I did.

Joe struggled to get up.

"But I – we …. after the concert – " he managed to get out.

"Yeah, Joe. I was there, too." I sarcastically spat at him.

"Well... umm. I guess you're not just my best friend anymore, eh?" I nudged him at my attempt to add humor to the dismay.

"Nice try." He faked a smile before dropping his face.

"Wait. Oh my gosh, Joseph." I realized only one thing.

"What?"

"What if I'm –" I didn't try to continue. I wouldn't say it.

"Don't worry" He almost laughed at my assumption. "I assure you that that would never happen. Besides, you're only 17 – right? Yeah. Yeah… that's like… not supposed to happen." He presumed while picking up a piece of clothing off of the ground.

"Right." I nodded to myself and copied his action.

We both slipped on what we needed. '_Not supposed to happen'_ I thought.

"Hey, Lilly?"

"What now, Joe?"

He hesitated while going over the different options in his head.

"I think you can have this, now." Joe said with a look of disbelief on his face whilst pulling a shiny object off of his left hand. It shimmered in the small lighting as he tossed it over to me. As to reveal nothing more than the palest skin ever to linger across his body.

Yeah. I know what you're thinking, my reader.

'_You would know.'_

I looked down to what was in my hand.

The ring.

The **purity** ring.

As I slipped it on my right hand, because I couldn't wear it on my left, either; my hands grew numb, cold, and clammy.

Now every time I looked down; there would be a piece of Sterling Silver guilt - snickering at me in its own special way.

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_I'm sorry that this is so short, but it's only the back story! I'm used to writing stories for YouTube, and you can't fit much in there. I guess I'll have to start writing more for fan-fiction chapters! Anyways;_

_I don't know why, but my favorite line in this is when Joe's like "You're only 17 - right? Yeah. Yeah... that's like... not supposed to happen."_

_xD Stupid boy!_

_Again, it's the GREY Brothers._

_ANYWAY.  
_

_Yeah. I don't know where I'm going with this in Chapter 3. Not THIS this, because this is just the back story. Still. Chapter 3 wants to be tricky. Anyways. I won't update too much. _

_But, boy, I'll be happy when I get past this stuff and actually into the drama, eh?_

_(:_

_  
Reviews make me happy. *nudge*  
_

_Love you lots!_

_~Nesh._**  
**


	3. Dialing Numbers

_Hey, guys(: So. this really isn't finished yet - this chapter at least. But I feel I've been procrastinating enough; so I wanted to post what I have. I won't add on to this one, and I'll just put the next part in chapter four instead. So THIS IS SHORT! Incredibly short. I'm sorry. I'll have longer ones coming up soon. :]_

_AND_

_seriously - I just got a great burst of ideas in the morning (12:00AM - 1:00AM)... so I started writing this new story. It'll probably be a short story, though. It's too long for a one shot - but I don't think long enough for a ... 20 chapter story, you know? It'll be called "Remembering Sunday" after the All Time Low song - for those of you who have heard that xD I'll post that right after this._

_Read. love. review._

_-Ness_

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_**October 5, 2008 - Saturday**_

"I'm sorry, but the number you have dialed is out of order. Please hang up and try your call again." The operator sung at me in a taunting voice.

"Of course" I whispered in the most frustrated tone.

I threw the phone towards the door. Just my luck.

Next, I had no choice but to fling myself back onto the couch and mope. There was nothing I could do.

Suddenly, the phone rang. I jumped in my seat hoping for God to give me a miracle. In a blink of an eye, I leaped to the door to grab the phone. Out of breath, I answered the ringing nightmare.

"Hello?" I breathed in; more self-conscious.

"I was just making sure you were off of the phone, Lils." Hayley replied through the other end.

Great. Just great.

"HAYLEY!" I yelled and hung the phone up once more.

Anything and everything ran through my head as I got off the phone with Hayley - hoping it to be my last shred of hope turning out to be nothing.

But only one thing could occur to me.

'_What was I going to do now? No phone number ; no Joe ; no telling him anything_.' I sighed in the most utterly fed up way possible. I had to give up.

Suddenly, an outburst of the memory of my cell phone came into my head_. Nicholas. Kevin._

_Their phone numbers._

Once again, I paced over to my phone.

_How could this not work?_

I clicked Nick's speed-dial number - number 3 to be exact - and hoped for the best.

_Ringing._

_Ringing._

_Ringing._

_Ringing._

It never ended.

I tried Kevin next. Nick could, possibly - somehow, be somewhere without his phone. Maybe. Kevin's always on the phone, right? He was bound to be there. It was fate.

_Ringing._

_Ringing._

"Hey, this is Kevin -"

"KEVIN! Oh, great. You're there! I need to talk to-"

"I'm most likely not here right now. Leave a message after that beep and I'll call you when I get the chance."

I didn't leave a message. He wasn't there. No one was.

Yes, the obvious thought of calling them again later - because they may have been on stage - popped into my brain, too. But I officially gave up. They wouldn't call back. They wouldn't notice I'd called and they wouldn't care, either.

And, the funny thing is, it rained all day.

_**October 6, 2008 - Sunday**_

_No, sir – well I don't wanna be the blame, not anymore_

_It's your turn to take a seat ; we're settling the final score_

_That's what you get when you let your heart win._

_Whoa …._

My eyes peeled open to the sound of my ringtone. Instead of grabbing it off of the table in a second, I groggily reached my hand over and looked at the caller I.D. Then my body froze.

My boyfriend.

Not Joseph.

My boyfriend before I found out I was… you know.

Oh – just perfect.


	4. At Least One Boy Knows

_Hey, Ash! IT'S FINALLY UP!!! lmfao._

_Oh my gosh, hai! xD I'm *so* freaking sorry that I haven't posted in FOREVER. The wait is long, I know. Hopefully y'all didn't forget about me!! Ahaa._

_So, anyways. I owe a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE thank you to my home-skillet-biscuit; Ashley. Maddie, too. :] But Ash practically asked me every single day if I had written. for months ;D So, FINALLY! We sat down in study hall and started writing. She gave me great feedback and some ideas. So thank you!_

_Anywhoooo. After that credit fest, here ya go! (: This one may be, again, short. I'm sorry. I'm still working on that! But the good news is that I have TONS of ideas for future chapters. So hang on, mann._

_.review._

_-Ness._

_p.s. - story takes off after 3rd chapter.. needda read that first, matee._

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"Hey there, darling." His voice rung through my ears as it carried through the cell phone.

"Uh- hi, Oliver." I responded – half dazed and half shocked that I forgot about my boyfriend.

Oliver Oaken.

"Uhm, uhh – I need to, uh, talk to you..?" I managed to stutter, half questioning.

"What? What's wrong? Are you okay, Lils?" Oliver practically screamed into the phone receiver.

"No, no… I'm-" I couldn't say 'fine', because I felt that I was nowhere near that expression. "Nothing's _wrong."_

"I'm coming over."

And then I heard the dial tone before I could respond.

I slammed the cellular phone shut.

This was going to take some time.

------

I had no idea how to do this. How to tell him.

There's only one way.

_Suck it up, Lilly. You can do this! He loves you. He'll understand! _I tried to encourage myself as much as possible before breaking down.

I sat frantically waiting to hear Oliver's pick up truck pull up in the small driveway of my tiny house.

Sitting on the couch, legs pulled up to my chest – I felt sick. Utterly and terribly sick. Sick because of the heartache, how Oliver would handle all of it, and because there was a monster inside of me.

My train of thought ended.

The doorbell rang.

My heart stopped and I started sweating non-stop. I didn't have time to rehearse any lines in my head before I was marked due for a fight.

Too late.

"Lilly?" I heard Oliver's voice through the thick front door.

I forced myself to pace over to the door frame. As clammy as my hands were – my stomach was filled with so many butterflies… apart from the… thing – I extended my arm over and grasped the door knob.

This was it.

This was all I had to do.

Before I knew it, I was being held in Oliver's arms in a tight embrace – only as a greeting.

He could probably see the tear stains left on my cheeks from the night before.

"Hi." I said in a small voice. Afraid, nervous, and guilty that it wasn't good news for him and rather another boy. If that.

He looked at me, inching me to continue and actually get to the point.

I grabbed his hand and led him over to the kitchen area.

He sighed as I watched him lean his weight to the counter.

I felt tears well in my eyes – stinging – suddenly I forced myself to take a deep breath.

He waited.

"Pregnant" I choked out; looking straight into his eyes waiting for the guilt to hit me.

He looked over to me confused – shock in his eyes.

"What?" he questioned me.

I felt like I was on trial.

"Me – Lilly. I'm pregnant, Oliver!" I screamed, tears falling down my face, as I motioned near my skinny waist.

"But… we never…." He tried to hammer out.

He finally realized what I meant.

He wasn't the father.

As I saw one tear fall down his left cheek, the rest was a blur. I found myself screaming at him – trying to calm him down. Then it hit me, too. He had a knife.

....

I tried to calm him down. I tried to do anything I could.

I gasped slightly and stared him dead in the eye. _He wouldn't._

Tears were streaming down both of our faces. Mine because of regret and the simple case of being afraid of what he'd do. His because of pain that I could ever do something like that to him.

"You're **what**?!" He yelled, teeth clenched.

I never knew Oliver had such a side to him.

"I-I'm .. I'm, uhm.." I stammered, not wanting to upset him any more than I had.

He didn't look satisfied.

"Lilly Nicole Truscott… with **who**?"

"Uhm-" I looked down in disappointment. "Joseph."

And then I saw it. After, I felt it.

Oliver lunged toward me, an over-sized razor in hand. It was all a blur. Suddenly throbbing pain was shot throughout every ounce of my body. Then it went black.

Pure and utter darkness.


	5. You're Wonderful

**Agh! I *sooooooooo* wanted to post! I've been waiting for WEEKS to post this darn thing, I finally got to it. I have to do this ASAP cause I need to go to a party sooooon, BUT I slammed down at the computer on directed study and did the last few sentences to complete this chapter - and I don't like it much. It really is just a filler, I guess. But I just really wanted to post for y'all.**

**So HERE IT IS!**

**I'm working on writing more and having them come to you sooner, I PROMISE!**

**(don't hold that against me ;D)  
**

**.review.**

**-Ness.**

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_Beep, beep, beep._

Alarms - coming from God knows what direction – made me groan in an almost muted tone. They were positively coming for me.

My half-to-open eyes fixed themselves on the bottom part of the wooden counters in my own house's kitchen. _Such a shame part of the blue-painted cabinets had to be ruined. _I was half-alive; laying on the kitchen floor with blood spilt everywhere. Who figured a stab would be so dramatic. It was just a slight stab...

Okay, it probably went too deep. Maybe hit something.

And, maybe, it ruined me inside.

Who cares.

_Lilly, you're so optimistic_. My conscious sarcastically spat at myself.

My body seemed paralyzed even after a failed attempt to feel again. My hand was already fixed on the knife. I couldn't get it to budge without killing myself. Or.. **that.**

I still couldn't admit what was in my stomach to myself yet.

In truth, I've only known I was pregnant for two days. Or was it one? Eh, whatever. Still. Did I honestly want** it** to die? No. That was inevitable. I knew that. Even if it just came apparent to me. Because, really, I didn't even put any thought into anything yet. I couldn't think of things in a few hours on top of the pressure of just figuring the main truth out myself. The questions – that I promised to figure out in the next month or so – were still there.

What I would be doing in a year from now – _if _the baby would be born by then. How Joe would react –_ if_ he found out soon enough. What name I would choose, _if_ I still can. If it's a boy or a girl, _if_ I live. Who'll help me out, _if_ people don't resent me by then.

Yes, that's my goal._ If_ I live.

Two months.

Two months for Joe to find out, two months to figure out what it is – so I can decide on a name with that 19 year old, brown haired boy.

_If._

From the looks of it, I can see that my future is full of a lot of 'ifs'.

My mind was racing by now. These moments seemed like good ones to pick to think.

Ha. Yeah right.

I could feel the sweat trickling down my face.

God, where's Oliver now?

Finally, the door to my kitchen – leading to the garage – swung open only to reveal quite bulky paramedics racing toward my ugly corpse. _Eck._

_  
_As my fragile body was lifted onto an incoming stretcher, I snapped my eyes shut. I didn't want to know what was to happen next. And most importantly – who would show up to visit me._If_I awoke again.

---

I looked down to the attire my pale body now had thrown over itself. A black tank-top, plain as can be, and short jean Capri's. I didn't even own these clothes.

_What?_ I pondered a bit.

Hauling my pastel arm to be bending towards the back of my sun kissed hair; I noted that it was all pulled into a very neat and high ponytail, only a few strips of bangs hanging over my right eye. Gracing my hands over my uniquely shaped face, the smudges of makeup were gone. Vanished. _What?_ I don't remember this…

The knife, Oliver, the **thing**, Joe, it.. it all just melted away. Turning to my left, I saw more details belonging to the strange place I was now present in.

_I didn't ever… _- suddenly, my thoughts went off as my attention placed itself over to the small pond available in the outlandish surroundings. My pace started again abruptly. Pulling my unexpectedly sore legs over to the riverbed, I tried to squint my eyes while still attempting to see, at least to the best of my ability. The sun blazing down on my bare shoulders, I bent down over and fell on my knees – _who cares if I got them a least bit dirty?_ Inserting my near-to-white hands in the water of the crystal clear stream, I cupped my small limbs and water flowed between the cracks of my hands. Scooping it up, I splashed the somewhat small amount of water onto my makeup-less face. Sigh.

Rising from the grass near the river, I focused more on what was around me. Trees placed in every direction.. it seemed my legs were standing on a plateau and there was no way off even if I tried, well, unless I wanted to trip and die.

_Nice thoughts, Lilly. Nice thoughts._ I silently chuckled to myself.

Whipping my head in the other direction, I noticed that long rocks towered upright pointing toward the sky, creating a circle – almost oval – around me. Well, I guess I could like it here..._ Yeah, right. Isn't this a bit awkward that I suddenly appeared here?_

_Wait! MAYBE THIS IS HEAVEN._

_No it isn't, you idiot._

It's like a devil and angel resting on my shoulders were cat fighting.

Again, another secret laugh escaped my mouth.

Looking straight ahead, my eyes situated themselves on what exactly I saw. A brown, almost black, haired boy wearing something roughly similar to me. I stepped forward, toes sinking into the rushing water.

"Joe…" I whispered, not really believing he'd be here, wherever it is.

He smirked a bit.

Wait, I had to tell him.

"I'm…" I started.

His face solemnly dropped before I proceeded. Hesitation fell silent over my voice box, and I notice he feared the actual truth. Probably guessing what it was, or maybe frightened of something far worse. Something that wasn't even related to the topic. Something that wasn't true. My mind thought quickly, _'What did he hear?'_

I stuttered his name once more.

Then, before I knew it – he vanished in thin air; left as quickly as he came.

Great.

---

My eyes flung open to the sound of a screech.

It was, absolutely, my own.

I woke up with a dim light coming through a window.

_Wait, this isn't my room._

The plain white painted texture in the four walled space made me groan

This… this was a hospital.

I blasted up in the bed – but then slammed back down because of the uncontainable pain.

Falling back down, I sighed. _It was a dream. Of course. _I should have figured something like that was bound to happen, because – obviously – it was beyond cliché. Isn't something like that involved in almost every story told? _God damn it._

I need to tell Joseph. I do. Of course I do – but now I need to hurry it up. Before anything else –

Crap.

Pushing itself into my narrow-minded brain, I certainly had to remember what happened just moments before. Or, well – was it hours? Or days? How long have I been in here?

I moaned again.

"Aw, would you just shut up over there? I'm trying to sleep!"

_Who the…_

I groggily flipped my head over to my left side, my chin resting on my shoulder to get a view of the other side of the room. There on the other section, I graced my eyes over a red headed, curly haired teenage girly girl with a mop bucket resting next to her bedside.

"Great. I have company." I mumbled to myself.

"Huh." The girl honked back.

"Ugh." I grabbed an extra pillow next to my skull and shoved it over my head, smashing my face.

"You're wonderful, Lilly," the red head sarcastically injected at me, "Just wonderful."


	6. Poll

Hey guys. I just wanted to say that I'm super sorry - but for right now the story is discontinued. It might not stay that way forever or anything, or I just might start a new one later and have a flare of this into that.. I don't know. Oh my gosh, I had/have some really great ideas for this story and I wrote them all down and blah blah blah, but now they just kinda seem to bore me & I don't want to rip off any other fanfic that other people have written. And I would tell you what they are, but I don't know if I'm going to continue with this. What was going to happen in this chapter was like Amber and Ashley came to visit Miley (Lilly's hospital room-mate) because they're like BFFs. xD Weird. But anyways, I got that far, but I didn't know what to write after that. I know summer should give me a good excuse to write, but I'm just stumped at where I'm at in the story right now. There was basically only like 2 things that I had planned that I was looking forward to... I might start a new story later tonight and stuff, but I just don't know! My writing skills have gotten better from last time I updated and stuff, too... but I'm sorry to the people that liked the story (which wasn't very many...) So what I would like for you guys to do is kinda do a little poll things, if that's not too much to ask?

**1. Continue or discontinue?**

**2. What are you TWO FAVORITE COUPLES?**

**3. What kind of fanfics do you guys read right now?**

**4. What situation(s) would you like to occur in a fanfic?**

**5. Would you read another story that I have written besides this one? (You can be TOTALLY honest.)**

**6. Any other comments/questions/etc. (just put whatever you want to put here. xD**


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